How often do you spend time in the present moment? For many of us, thinking about “right now” has to take a back seat to the duties of tomorrow and the mistakes of yesterday. Being present means in today’s age talking about something that bothered us at work or sorting out the kids’ schedules for the next few weeks.

But what about us? Our needs and our desires?

I think we sometimes get too invested in three things: our futures, our pasts, and the opinions of those around us. It’s really difficult to “just be” when we are too concerned with one, two or all of the three mentioned above. We constantly think about what we did to get into the situation we are currently in. We think about how our futures will be if we can’t figure out our present. And we allow the words of others to make both our past and our future frightening prospects.

Instead of worrying about everything else – the presentation in four days, the date  that went sour two weeks ago, or our friends’ take on what really happened in our last job – let go of all of it. Take care of this moment, and relish in the beauty of being present.

Other people may define you by what you did in your past, but you can define you by what you are doing in this moment. The crabs in your bucket may want to remind you of how your past money mistakes could follow you for the rest of your life. They’ll talk about how it’s so hard to change, and that doing little things today won’t add up to anything significant for your future.

Those crabs are just trying to pull you back down in the bucket with them. But you don’t have to be overtaken by their negativity. Choose to spend each moment wisely; don’t give away your moments to those that won’t fill them with positivity.

Action step

This week, don’t think about anything other than the moment you are in right now. If you have to, schedule some time into your day where you spend time living in the present moment. It could be something as simple as taking a walk without thinking about your bills or spending some extra quiet time with your spouse. Spend your free moments this week engulfed in the present, and “just be.”

Whether we like it or not, our childhood experiences shaped certain parts of our personalities as adults. Were you one of many children (like me) and had somewhat of a scarcity mindset when money was involved? Or were you an only child given an endless supply of the things you wanted, including money?

Whatever your situation was, you were learning from it the moment you were welcomed into this world. Our parents, our siblings, our relatives and our friends were our most consistent teachers. We watched our family’s struggles with paying the bills or their lavishness with money as a result of having a lot of it. Subconsciously, we took on their actions and created our own money cues that we carry with us still as adults.

Like many people, I was shocked to see how my learned money behaviors spilled over into other areas of my life. And the biggest giveaway was my relationship with food. When I was given a treat as a child, I would devour it immediately. I was afraid that if I didn’t, I would lose my treat. As an adult, I discovered this pattern led to overeating. And that related directly to my patterns of overspending. Have you noticed anything like this in your life?

Sometimes, I think many of us feel like we’re trapped by our habits. When we’ve grown comfortable with a certain action, we feel like it’s so ingrained in whom we are as human beings that it’s impossible to change it.

Luckily, we are not our inherited habits. We’re free-thinking human beings, and we can take charge of our actions. We are the deciders of our fate; if you want a life a filled with financial, personal and professional abundance, we can take meaningful steps towards that daily.

Action step

What are your inherited beliefs? Take some time this week to look back on your childhood. Think about the things you saw your parents doing; describe the role money played in your household growing up. Try and remember their attitudes toward their finances; were they positive or negative when they spoke about money?

Now, compare your money experiences as a child to the things you do now as an adult. Think about the habits you feel are holding you hostage. More than likely, those actions are stemmed from specific things you learned growing up. Accept those experiences – as well as the money habits you have now as a result of them – without judgment, and let them all go. Once you do that, you’ll be able to move forward in your abundant life.

Sometimes, we get so caught up in the dollars and cents of things that we can’t see the bigger picture. We go through the daily motions of our lives, continuing to engage in unhealthy behaviors that aren’t in line with our purpose.

Our financial lives suffer when our actions are disconnected from our purpose – our Inner Wealth. We engage in unhealthy behaviors. We are unhappy. And we feel lost. When we stop listening to our spirits and we start doing things that we think we’re supposed to do, we move further away from what we are meant to be doing.

When we fix one area of our lives, the others improve. Your Inner Wealth, though, is a little different. It remains steady no matter what choices we make in all other aspects of our lives. If you’re your financial life isn’t where you want it to be, chances are you’ve made decisions that weren’t aligned with your Inner Wealth.

Begin to view your finances – as well as your work, home, friends and family – as a steady stream to and from your Inner Wealth. Know that each choice in any area of your life is either feeding your Inner Wealth or depleting it. If you’re not sure what you should be doing, just listen to your spirit. Let it be your guide in your journey, and allow yourself to be great.

Being great doesn’t mean making the most money or having the most in savings. It’s not about having the biggest home or the most expensive car. It’s about living your desired life each day, regardless of what’s going on. Use yourself as a guide (because only you are capable of defining what your “great” is), and walk intently on your path of greatness.

Action step

Surrender to greatness; let go of the idea of what you think you should be, and allow yourself to be the person that you are meant to be. This week, practice listening to yourself. Not your thoughts about work, or your opinions about what someone said. Listen to your body, your spirit, your gut.

Take notice of the moments you are truly blissful. Listen more intently during the moments you feel anger or fear. As you begin to listen more to yourself, you’ll see the bigger picture of what you are meant to be.

Cook More                  

Eating out take a chunk out of our monthly money plans – or it busts it completely. I’m not telling you to go cold-turkey on dinners out with friends. But consider just cutting back on your daily trips to the deli or your go-to take out dinner. Taking 10 minutes to cook breakfast instead of grabbing it on the go every day adds up, and so does packing a lunch instead of heading out with coworkers.

Take public transportation

What would you do with an extra thousand dollars this month? If you leave your car at home for four weeks, you’ll soon find out! A recent American Public Transportation Association study showed that taking public transportation instead of driving saved $1000 in the month of February.

Adding up the cost of maintenance, gas, wear-and-tear issues and your time – arguably the most valuable asset – going from a two car home to a one-car one for a year could save you $12,000. What could you do with an extra $12,000 at the end of the year?

Walk or ride your bike

It’s April, and pleasant weather is here to stay with warmer temperatures and plenty of sunshine. Instead of being cooped up in the car, consider walking or riding your bike. Chicago is the 4^th most walkable city in the United States according to Walk Score. Walking gives you valuable time outdoors; and being in the sun not only helps our bodies produce vitamin D, but also improves our moods.

Get rid of things you don’t love

Look around at your life right now and consider the things you could do without. Rank what’s the most important to you (Gym membership? Book club? Shopping sprees?), and then cut the things that you don’t love. If you don’t absolutely have to go to that painting class, let it go. Or if your morning latte is a non-negotiable, keep it and get rid of something else.

Another thing to consider is eliminating some of your cable. Almost all of your favorite shows are online, and the majority of them are completely free. Check out the different network iPhone and iPad apps (ABC, for one) for free content anytime. Also, you can check out both Amazon and iTunes to purchase your favorite shows.

Action step

The main goal here is to know where your money is going. Take an hour this week to just lay our your finances so you can see what you spend the most on. Once you know where you are spending your money, you know where you can make cuts.

What type of dreamer are you?

Do you think your dreams are attainable or completely unrealistic? “Pie-in-the-sky” dreamers are quite often their own biggest crabs in their bucket. They think about the way they wish their life to be – stable financial foundation, beautiful dream home, a career that they love – but they look at where they are and deem that life impossible. There’s no way they can create this abundant life when they are coming from a place of scarcity, they think.

Dreamers that believe their dreams are catchable look at where they are and accept it. This is their current reality. And if they could create this, then they can also create the life of their dreams, no matter how unrealistic it they seem. They don’t view their finances as a crutch or obstacle their end point; they view it as an aide. No matter how bleak their current money situation is, they know that it can all change today.

Having the courage to dream

I worked with a client who, at 72 years old, was a widower, and his whole goal was to just save his money for his kids to inherit.  I told him get busy living or get busy dying; he should try to find something he always dreamed of doing.  He never could think of anything.  Then I asked him if he had any regrets in life. He did: being a lawyer.

So I asked him, why not now?

He said people his age don’t go back to school. But I kept bringing it up to him on our quarterly meetings, asking him if he took the LSAT or looked up some schools.  Over a year later, he showed up to my office with his law school acceptance letter.  He not only finished law school, but practiced until he was 84. He had the courage to dream and live the rest of his days.

Are you looking at your dreams in a catchable way? You can absolutely do what my client did because it truly is never too late to go after what you want. So instead of being uncertain, look at your dreams as catchable. More specifically, be realistic about where you how, where you want to go and how you will get there.

Action step

I emphasize accepting where you are to get to where you want to be. But before you do that, it’s a good idea to picture what you want to go so you have an idea of the direction your first step should be in.

This week I want you to dare to dream not bigger, but better. Don’t hold back on your dreams because you think they’re not possible or unrealistic. Write down three of your most sincere dreams on a piece of paper, and read over what you wrote a few times a day. Don’t come from a place of judgment, but one of realism. Accepting where you are right now means also accepting the dreams you want for yourself in the future.

We donate clothes we haven’t worn in months (or years) to make room for new threads or to just create more space. We get rid of paintings, shoes, holiday decorations or old hobby items that we no longer have use for. Basically, we clean house.

The common theme during these spring cleaning activities is how much stuff we have. Many of it we’ve only used or worn a time or two, if ever. And we wonder how – when we constantly complain about  not having enough space – how do we manage to find room for something new?

The idea of creating space is a theme I’ve been thinking about a lot lately. Removing items to make room for better things is a commonly accepted way to usher in a new and improved quality of life. But does it really work? I posed a question on my Facebook page not long ago that I’m going to revisit here:

What do you need to let go of in your life to gain freedom?

Minimalists believe that having a lot of material things traps us, and that we need to live a simpler life in order to truly be happy and be free. I believe that this same idea can be used for the emotional things we carry with us each day. We hold onto the memories of bad experiences – failures, heartbreaks, etc. – and we succumb to the fear of reopening closed wounds.

As I’ve said before, our emotional state greatly affects the way we handle our finances. Going on a spending spree to temporarily erase negative feelings isn’t uncommon. But it could be causing you great strife in other areas of your life. Hanging on to the emotional baggage of our past is just as dangerous as hoarding old clothes and other items. Maybe your security blanked isn’t a garage full of old trinkets, but a mind full of bad memories.

Action step

Have you ever considered that your spending is rooted in emotional pain? I speak of this a lot, but maybe you haven’t acknowledged what exactly is causing you to spend excessively. Now is as good a time as any to examine the emotional scars you reckon with daily as a way to cope with your everyday struggles.

This week, I want you to focus on letting go of the emotional baggage you carry, one tote at a time. As you begin to walk away from your past struggles, embrace the feeling of freedom. Know that the more you let go of your past, the closer you get to the abundance in your financial future.

For many people, the deciding factor is fear. We want to pursue a graduate degree to switch or improve our careers, but we’re afraid. We want to take our first solo vacation, but we’re afraid to go it alone for a week in an unfamiliar place. We want to create a better financial future, but we’re afraid to change what we are doing for fear of failure.

How often do you find yourself afraid of the future? Afraid to take a risk because of what might happen? It’s pretty common for people to forgo the road less traveled for the safer bet of the one they’re already comfortably navigating. Yet, many find themselves unhappy within that comfort but too afraid to test the waters of doing something different

Being afraid of the future may mean you’re letting your past hold you back. Failures in years gone by and the shame, disappointment and guilt associated with them can leave us with negative feelings. Instead of learning and growing from the mistakes of our past, we let it stifle us. Taking risks terrifies us to the point of inaction, and we find ourselves in an unhappy, unfulfilled place.

Luckily, each day is another opportunity to change your life for the better. So today, make it a point to face your fear. Don’t allow the sandbags in your life to let you sink. Remember, there is nothing wrong with being afraid as long as you don’t allow fear to stop you from pursuing your passions.

Action step

We all have fears. The difference is how each of us copes with that fear. Don’t let the fear you have stop you from from pursing our goals – financial or otherwise. Pick the option that propels you towards them, and let go of the sandbags keeping you in place. So what’s holding you back?

This week, think about the things in your life that are weighing you down. Consider moments when you declined an opportunity that may have opened a door for you. Or reminisce on times when you decided against doing something potentially fun or interesting because you were afraid.

Write some of those experiences down on a piece of paper and think about why you truly said “no” to them. Facing the fears that crippled you in your past and have a hold on you presently will help you overcome them in your future.

Many would argue that the basis of our emotional state is our happiness. That we could not truly be happy if we are not emotionally sound and secure in who we are as human beings. Since we do not feel happy, we try to find that happiness at every possible corner. By that, I mean we look for happiness in all-things external hoping that it will eventually seep into our inner selves and turn us into happy people. When this doesn’t work, we are emotionally – and even sometimes physically – exhausted.

Does this sound familiar? Maybe you’ve realized that you surrounded yourself with negative people. Or that the work you do doesn’t fulfill you – you’re only working there because of the paycheck. Maybe one of your most important relationships had changed so much that it’s unrecognizable, and you’re devastated at the thought of letting go of someone that was at one time a central figure in your life.

Whatever the root of your unhappiness is, it is causing greater damage to your life than you may realize. But there is good news here; it doesn’t have to stay that way. You are in the driver’s seat of your life. You just have to accept where you are right now before you can speed off into the future.

Accepting yourself

You may not be able to change everything around you, but you can change yourself. To change, you must accept. Accept yourself. Accept yourself in your current reality. You must stop blaming yourself for your failures and instead empower yourself for the changes you can make right now for a better future.

Remove shame, blame, guilt and judgment from your life in all areas. But be sure to start with yourself. It’s okay that you made mistakes, got hurt, or said something wrong. Once you let go of perfection or an unattainably high standard, you’ll see that who you are is who you need to be to learn and grow. And that’s okay.

Before you can create solutions to your financial life ; before you can be innovative in your personal and professional lives; before you can shift to higher vibrations; before you can heal your relationship with money, you must accept yourself.

Not a month from now. Not 20 pounds from now. Not $15,000 from now. Not a new house from now.

Right now.

Action step

Where are you right now? Do you love yourself? Do you accept yourself? Are you willing to meet yourself where you are right now? In previous posts, I’ve told you to spend some quiet time thinking about a specific aspect of your life. But this week, I want you to do one simple thing that is the base of everything we’ve covered:

Accept yourself.

Accept your surroundings, your habits, and your current hobbies. Accept your failures and successes. Accept YOU – all of you; not just the good. Accepting who you are right now is what needs to happen before anything else can take flight.

So what did you find out about yourself? How many things do you do each day or week that you truly don’t like? Seeing those things listed on a piece of paper means you know exactly what to start eliminating. And once those things that make you unhappy are eliminated, you can start filling the empty space with the things you truly desire.

Finding harmony

Now that you have eliminated what you don’t want, it’s time to focus on the things that you have dreamed about. When you go after the things you truly desire, you are putting your inner wealth at the center of your life. And once your actions are in line with that inner wealth, you are living harmoniously.

Living in harmony with your inner wealth means that you have accepted your current reality. When you get an uneasy feeling, you know that something isn’t aligned between your life’s purpose and your actions. Finding that harmony between your actions, intentions, emotions and reality makes going with the flow of your daily life easier because you’ll know what next step to take.

So often, people are fearful of taking the road less traveled; but when you listen to your gut and are aligned with your heart space, you really have nothing to fear. That’s why finding that harmony and living harmoniously every day is the key to inner wealth and true happiness.

Action step

I believe that inner healing leads to outer health; to be on the road to healing, you must also be on the road to harmonious life. When you embrace inner peace and harmony, you allow your authentic self to shine to the world.

You wrote down the things you didn’t like last week because you wanted to live the life created specifically for you. This week (and for the next ones coming – this is an ongoing process), write down who you think you are. Are you an innovator? A teacher or a student? How about patient? Trusting? Open and giving?

If this feels clouded or gray to you, think back to when you were a child – what made you giggle? What did you want to be when you grew up? Tap into your Authentic Self.

There is only one rule to this exercise – focus on who you feel you are; each word you write will help you live a life of true harmony.

Questioning our choices during rocky periods is pretty normal for most people. We look at the things we’ve done in some or all of the areas in our lives, and we second guess the steps we’ve taken. Did we build the right career in our work life? Are we spending too much time worrying about relationships in our personal life? Will the economic instability affect our family life negatively? Is our financial life going to suffer because of the disorder happening in the other areas of our lives?

Finding ourselves in undesirable situations leaves us with two options: thinking “what if?” or changing our perspective. Instead of seeking out peace of mind in changing all-things exterior, look within. When we look to others for the roadmap to living our lives, we make things more complicated. Outside fixes cloud and confuse us, making the life path made specifically for us much harder to see.

Getting caught up in the outside things you can’t control can affect you deeply. Allowing what your parents think, what your kids want or what your siblings say to make your decisions is putting them in the driver’s seat of your life. To live your own life , you must first stop jumping on other people’s paths and then focus on the one crafted just for you.

Action step

Whose life are you living? Whose path are you walking on? If you’re not sure, that’s ok. Spend this week sorting out your actions from your true intentions. If you’re doing things that aren’t tapping into your heart space, why are you doing them?

Take a look at the things you do that are not fulfilling you. After you list those actions on paper, eliminate one of them this week. Replace it with something that’s more in line with your ideal life. Live the life of your dreams -  walk on the path made just for you – not anyone else’s.